Recycled
by xkissfromarosex
Summary: Rose teaches the Doctor a thing or two about womanhood. Reviews are welcomed with open arms.x


"What the hell is this?" The Doctor exclaimed. He was searching for his favourite pencil, and Rose's room was just the place to look. Unfortunately, he had stumbled across something else that had worried him. He had found a long, spongy, white thing, the length of his little finger. He stared at it, and pulled on the small string coming from the bottom. He waited for some sort of alien to pop out, and bite him on the nose. He had a sudden brainwave. Was it...no! "ROSE!" He called, and he kicked the box back under the bed. Rose shuffled in and sighed.

"What?" She pulled her hefty jumper off and chucked it onto the small chair next to the door.

"What is this?" He asked, shoving the white thing into her hands. Rose frowned and looked down. "I found this in your draw. Do you want to tell me something?" He put his hands on his hips as Rose chuckled. "Why are you laughing? You're meddling with drugs! Now, I will be here to help you through this tough time in our life, but I-"

"Drugs?" She bent over laughing. The Doctor looked cross.

"It's not funny, Rose! You could get arrested for owning a Class A drug!" He scolded her. Rose sniffed and she wiped away her tears of laughter. "Now you have composed yourself, would you like to tell me what the meaning of _this_?" He pointed to it, and tapped his feet impatiently. Humans could be so stupid sometimes! Why waste your life on a drugs and drinks, when they would be out in the world, exploring and discovering new and exciting things? "Rose, you're a bright girl. Why would you do this to yourself? Do you think Christopher Columbus snorted cocaine just before he went off to discover America? Do you think that Isaac Newton had just taken E while sitting under that apple tree? DO YOU?"

"It's not a drug!" Rose protested, grinning.

"What is it then, hmm?"

"It's a-"

"Remember, I have a very high IQ," The Doctor told her, and Rose rolled her eyes.

"How could I forget? You go on about it all the time!" She muttered, and the Doctor looked offended. "What? Do you want me to tell the truth or not?"

"Yeah..but not about me, about this drug thing!" He sighed, waving it about.

"For the last time, it's not a drug. It's a tampon!" Rose said, like it was obvious. The Doctor glanced at it, dropped it onto the table quickly and pulled a face. "Do you not believe me? I'll use it, if you want-"

"No, no, thanks. I believe you," He said hastily, and he wiped his fingers on his trousers.

"Are you sure? Here's the box," She pulled the box back out from under the bed and picked it up. "Look. It says 'ere: 'Tampons. Change every two hours. Not to be recycled.' Is that enough proof?"

"What does it mean, 'recylcled'?"

"It means once it's been used, it can't be used again. I thought a super genius like you would already know that," Rose smiled, mocking him. "But yeah, you do have to change it every few hours. So recycled is a good word. You don't really want to be wearing yesterdays tampon, do you? Did you not know that?"

"And that even applies to...women things?" The Doctor said, uncomfortable. Rose noticed that he was looking shifty, so she decided to have some fun with it. "Don't you wear pad..thingies?"

"Yeah, but we run a lot. I don't want it to be all over the place, if you know what I mean," she winked.

"Luckily, no, I have no idea what that means," He mumbled. "So, uh, is it uncomfortable to wear?" Rose shrugged and pushed the box back into its original place under the bed.

"Nah, not really. Most of the time, you forget it." The Doctor nodded, and he glanced around the room. "Any more questions you want to ask me, Doctor? How about we have a rifle through my bra draw, and I can tell you all about the different size cups? Doesn't that sound fun?" She asked, grinning. Of course she was joking, and the Doctor made a face.

"Sarcasm doesn't suit you!" He moaned, and went out of the room. Rose chuckled to herself.

For an intelligent alien with a enormous IQ, he wasn't half daft!

* * *

**This is the most random idea for a story that I've ever had! I hope you enjoyed it!**

**Please review.**

**x**


End file.
